From Bodyguards to Wrestlers

Andrew Martin  tyson-tomko

Tyrus

 

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Before they became wrestlers, four guys once served as bodyguards for famous music artists. Former WWE and GFW Superstar the late Andrew “Test” Martin was a bodyguard for legendary rock band Motley Crue, former WWE and GFW Superstar Tomko was a bodyguard for Limp Bizkit, former GFW Superstar Tyrus was a bodyguard for iconic hip hop artist and WWE Hall of Famer (Celebrity Wing) Snoop Dogg and current WWE Superstar Sheamus was a bodyguard for legendary rock band and fellow Irishmen U2. All four of these men would go on to achieve success in the world of wrestling. Test would go on to hold the Intercontinental, European, Hardcore, and World Tag Team Championships; I definitely think he was one of the most underrated wrestlers. Tomko would go on to become a GFW Unified World Tag Team Champion and a team captain for Team Tomko, a team of the best Superstars GFW had to offer; I would also put him in the underrated category. Tyrus found success in GFW by earning himself an opportunity at the GFW Global Championship, but he came up short; I would also label him underrated. Sheamus is in the prime of his career right now; …

WWE Debuts It’s Second Reality TV Show

As some may know, Tough Enough was the first reality TV show that WWE made. Tough Enough is a show that features contestants competing to become the next WWE Superstar. Last Sunday, it was the debut of WWE’s second reality TV Show, Total Divas. Total Divas is a show that revolves around the professional and personal lives of WWE Divas Natalya Neidhart, The Funkadactyls (Naomi & Cameron Lynn) of Tons of Funk (Brodus Clay, Tensai, & The Funkadactyls), The Bella Twins (Nikki & Brie), and WWE’s newest Divas Jo-Jo Offerman and Eva Marie. On the first episode of Total Divas, some very interesting things were revealed. First off, it was revealed that some of the divas are in respective relationships with their fellow WWE Superstars; Nikki is dating WWE Champion John Cena, Brie is dating Daniel Bryan, Naomi is engaged to Jimmy of The Usos (Jimmy & Jey), and Jo-Jo is dating Justin Gabriel of International Airstrike (Justin Gabriel & Tyson Kidd). It was also revealed why the 8-Person Mixed Tag Team Match between Tons of Funk and the team of the now-defunct Team Rhodes Scholars (Damien Sandow & Cody Rhodes) and The Bellas that was supposed to happen at …

WWE Smackdown 6-28-13: Del Rio Fiesta Spoiled

 

Kaitlyn Turns the Tables On AJ Lee

WWE Divas Champion AJ Lee (accompanied by Big E Langston) went one-on-one with Natalya Neidhart in a non-title match. Right when the match officially got under way, AJ’s theme music hit and it was none other than Kaitlyn coming out dressed as AJ, similar to what AJ did to Kaitlyn on Raw the previous Monday. Kaitlyn then went on to ridicule her former BFF by telling everybody that in addition to the vast number of superstars AJ has been intimate with, there are rumors that she has been intimate with several of the WWE personnel that were seated at ringside, including Smackdown ring announcer Lilian Garcia. After AJ and Natalya began locking up with one another, Kaitlyn, at one point, began to skip around ringside in typical AJ fashion, which not only drove AJ insane, but provided enough of a distraction to allow Natalya to roll up AJ to get the pin and the win. After the match, Kaitlyn put the exclamation point on her mind games by hitting AJ with her signature maneuver “The Spear”.

Other Money In the Bank Ladder Match Announced

Backstage, WWE Chairman and CEO Vincent K. McMahon …

WWE Main Event 6-26-13: The Shield’s New Competition

The Shield Are Put On Notice

Christian went one-on-one with United States Champion and Shield leader Dean Ambrose in a non-title match. Christian was out for retribution after being attacked by The Shield (Dean Ambrose & WWE Tag Team Champions Seth Rollins & Roman Reigns) on Smackdown from the previous Friday. In the end, Christian got the win via disqualification after the other two Shield members came out and attacked Christian. The Shield continued their attack on Christian, until the the #1 contenders to the WWE Tag Team Championship and Reigns’ second cousins The Usos (Jimmy & Jey) came out to even the odds. In the end, Christian and The Usos drove The Shield away from the ring. This all lead to a Six-Man Tag Team Match for that week’s upcoming Smackdown.

Tons of Funk Get A Grand Introduction, Only to Be Defeated

Tons of Funk (Brodus Clay & Tensai) got introduced in grand fashion when their corner women The Funkadactyls (Naomi & Cameron Lynn), along with WWE’s newest diva Jo-Jo Offerman, performed Tons of Funk’s & The Funkadactyls’ theme music “Somebody Call My Momma”. Personally, I thought their singing was as beautiful as they are. All three of these …

WWE Raw 6-17-13: Daniel Bryan Finally Proves to the Entire World (or Rather Himself) That He Is Not the “Weak Link”

 Double Disqualification = Rematch

The show began with a rematch between Randy Orton and Daniel Bryan. I am a fan of both of these men and I was not sure who to root for in this one. At one point, both men ended up outside the ring and got so aggressive with one another to the point where they both ended up getting disqualified. This led to Bryan, who has been obsessed with not being called the “weak link” for quite some time now, going to Raw Managing Supervisor Vickie Guerrero and demanding a rematch for later in the evening, which Vickie eventually agreed to.

AJ Lee Strikes Again

During a match between Kaitlyn (accompanied by Layla El) and Aksana, Kaitlyn’s theme music hit and out comes WWE Divas Champion AJ Lee dressed as her. Aksana tried to take advantage of the distraction, but Kaitlyn was able to hit her with her signature maneuver “The Spear” to get the pin and the win. After the match, AJ Lee had her friend Big E Langston come out and they then proceeded to mock Kaitlyn by re-enacting the hoax that AJ pulled on Kaitlyn a few weeks ago. Layla ended up having …

WWE Superstars 6-13-13: Our Heroes Get Robbed

On this edition of Superstars, one-half of Tons of Funk Tensai (accompanied by the other half of Tons of Funk Brodus Clay & The Funkadactyls (Naomi & Cameron Lynn) went one-on-one with one-half of The Prime Time Players Titus O’Neil (accompanied by the other half of The Prime Time Players Darren Young). In the end, thanks to an assist from Darren Young, Titus O’Neil was able to defeat Tensai. Also, in the main event, one-half of Team Co-Bro Zack Ryder went one-on-one with the leader of 3MB Heath Slater (accompanied by fellow 3MB cohorts Drew McIntyre & Jinder Mahal). In the end, thanks to a distraction by both McIntyre and Mahal, Slater was able to defeat Ryder. It was definitely a travesty of how our heroes were robbed of their victories.…

WWE Main Event 6-12-13: The Usos Bring Down the Funk

The show began with The Miz going one-on-one with one-half of Team Rhodes Scholars Cody Rhodes. The regular commentary team for Main Event is Josh Mathews, The Miz, & Ricardo Rodriguez, but since The Miz was in a match, Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett provided commentary with Josh Mathews throughout the show, with Ricardo Rodriguez being absent altogether for some reason. As for the match, The Miz was victorious. Also, in the main event, it was two fan favorite tag teams going at it as The Usos (Jimmy & Jey) faced Tons of Funk (Brodus Clay & Tensai) (accompanied by The Funkadactyls (Naomi & Cameron Lynn). In the end, it was The Usos who came out on top to end the program. I am a fan of both of these teams, but I was rooting for The Usos in this one. I also think that no matter which team walks out of the upcoming WWE Pay-Per-View event, Payback, as WWE Tag Team Champions, whether it’d be the defending champions Seth Rollins & Roman Reigns of The Shield or the unlikely pairing of Randy Orton and one-half of Team Hell No Daniel Bryan, The Usos should get the next opportunity at the …

WWE Superstars 6-6-13: All of the Heroes Conquer

On this edition of Superstars, Tons of Funk (Brodus Clay & Tensai) (accompanied by The Funkadactyls (Naomi & Cameron Lynn) took on The Colons (Primo Colon & Epico). While Rosa Mendes normally accompanies The Colons for their matches, she was conspicuous by her absence on this edition of Superstars. As for the match, it was Tons of Funk who emerged victorious. In the main event, it was the battle between two 3rd Generation Divas when Natalya Neidhart went one-on-one with Tamina Snuka with Natalya emerging victorious. All of our heroes conquered on this edition of Superstars.…

WWE’s Current Most Underrated Superstars

Today in WWE, there are numerous superstars that I feel aren’t entirely getting the credit or fame that they deserve. I feel that WWE’s current most underrated superstars are, in no particular order, Kofi Kingston, Bo Dallas, Zack Ryder, Sasha Banks, Paige, Sami Zayne, Brodus Clay, Tensai, Sin Cara, Justin Gabriel, Tyson Kidd, Ted DiBiase, Jr.; Yoshi Tatsu, Evan Bourne, Santino Marella, and Alex Riley. WWE really needs to start giving these guys a push and in some cases, again.…

WWE Superstars 5-23-13: Twins’ Night

On this edition of Superstars, in a very unique and unexpected 8-Person Mixed Tag Team Match, Tons of Funk (Brodus Clay & Tensai) & The Funkadactyls (Naomi & Cameron Lynn) took on two identical twin duos in The Usos (Jimmy & Jey) and The Bella Twins (Nikki & Brie). It didn’t make sense that these two twin duos were teaming up because The Usos are currently faces and The Bellas are currently heels and that’s the way they went into and out of this match-up. The only sense I can make out of this is that someone who had the power to make decisions in the WWE wanted to know what it was like seeing these two twin duos team up. Either way, I am a fan of all of the competitors that were in this match, except for The Bellas; I was rooting for Tons of Funk & The Funkadactyls in this one. The two twin duos did have a few issues co-existing with each other during the match. I also noticed that throughout the match that Jimmy Uso and Naomi were kind of eying one another. As a matter of fact, after Brodus Clay finished off Jimmy to …

WWE Hangout 5-9-13: Brodus Clay Stops By

On this edition of Hangout, the special guest was one-half of Tons of Funk Brodus Clay. He told the WWE Universe that the one superstar, past or present, he wished he had the opportunity to wrestle is WWE Hall of Famer Andre the Giant. He also told the WWE Universe, in his opinion, one positive and negative thing about wrestling training. He actually said that the toll that taking the bumps in the ring that take on your body are both positive and negative. As far as why it’s negative, I think the answer is pretty obvious. As far as why it’s positive, Brodus says that it can help you withstand WWE’s yearly schedule both inside the ring and on the road. These were some of the numerous things that Brodus discussed on Hangout. You can catch Hangout on WWE on YouTube.…

WWE Raw 4-29-13: The Shield Remains Undefeated As A Trio

The show began with a Triple Threat Match set up by the Senior Advisor to the Smackdown General Manager (WWE Hall of Famer Booker T) Teddy Long. Teddy did not run this by Booker T like he’s supposed to. As for the match, it was between Ricardo Rodriguez (accompanied by Alberto Del Rio), NXT Champion Big E Langston (accompanied by World Heavyweight Champion Dolph Ziggler & AJ Lee), and Zeb Colter (accompanied by Jack Swagger). At the upcoming Extreme Rules Pay-Per-View event, Dolph Ziggler will be defending his championship against both Alberto Del Rio and Jack Swagger in a Triple Threat Match. The winner in this Triple Threat Match between Rodriguez, Langston, and Colter would allow his respective representative to choose the stipulation for the Triple Threat Match at Extreme Rules. After outside interference from all parties, it was Rodriguez who rolled up Colter for the pin and the win; therefore, Del Rio got to choose the stipulation for his match at Extreme Rules. Also, just hours after making an appearance on the talk show “Today”, Cena came to Raw with three Make-A-Wish Kids. The three Make-A-Wish Kids were granted their wishes by becoming honorary WWE Superstars for the evening. …

WWE Superstars 4-18-13: 3rd Generation Divas Clash

In the first match of the night, Tons of Funk (Brodus Clay & Tensai) with The Funkadactyls (Naomi & Cameron) in their corner took on Primo & Epico with Rosa Mendes in their corner in a David vs. Goliath encounter. In the end, Tons of Funk were victorious. In the main event, it was a clash between two 3rd Generation Divas as Natalya went one-on-one with Tamina Snuka. In the end, Natalya forced Tamina to submit to her uncle’s famous submission maneuver, the Sharpshooter. The rest of the program just took a look back at events from this past Monday’s Raw.…

WWE Main Event 4-10-13: Will Anybody Ever Stop The Shield?

On this edition of Main Event, The Miz was absent for some unknown reason, so unfortunately, JBL sat in for him on commentary. I am getting sick and tired of having to listen to this douche bag every single week. He says the same things over and over again, he defends and applauds the dastardly deeds of his fellow heels, he keeps saying things that have me second-guessing myself, which is causing me serious psychological harm, these are just some of the few uninteresting and unentertaining things that the WWE Universe and I are forced to put up with every single week. The wrestling world would be much better off without heel commentators, the wrestling shows would be much more enjoyable. Anyway, the program began with a 6-Man Tag Team Match between the team of Kofi Kingston and Tons of Funk (Brodus Clay & Tensai) with The Funkadactyls (Naomi & Cameron Lynn) in their corner against The Shield (Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, & Roman Reigns). This was the first Main Event match for all three members of The Shield. At one point during the match, Tons of Funk told The Funkadactyls to head to the back due to The Shield’s …

WWE Raw 4-8-13: The Crowd Takes Over Raw the Night After WrestleMania 29

This edition of Raw took place at the IZOD Center in East Rutherford, New Jersey. This was the night after WrestleMania 29 and this may have been either the most fun, exciting, or bizarre (depending on which way you look at it) Raw in history. WWE Hall of Famer Jerry “The King” Lawler has been known for calling Canada “Bizarro Land”, but after seeing this edition of Raw, East Rutherford, New Jersey may very well be “Bizarro Land”. For three straight hours, the crowd chanted the most random things at random times. Some chants were heard for Wade Barrett, Dolph Ziggler, Jerry Lawler, John “Bradshaw” Layfield, the late Randy Savage, and even announcers Michael Cole and Justin Roberts and referee Mike Chioda. The crowd even chanted “We Are Awesome!”. Well, like I said, it just depends on how you look at it. But the chant that truly took over the rest of the night was when the crowd hummed Fandango’s entrance music, even after Raw went off the air. All I can say is that I am sure there are many things that would be an understatement to describe what we heard/witnessed last night on Raw. As for the show …

WWE WrestleMania 29: Undertaker 21-0, Triple H the Wrestler Lives, Alberto Del Rio Retains, and John Cena Gets Redemption

WrestleMania 29 took place at MetLife Stadium in East Rutherford, New Jersey. The first match of the night was during the WrestleMania Pre-Show when Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett defended against The Miz. With his mother sitting front row at ringside, The Miz defeated Barrett to become the new champion. Therefore, Wade Barrett still has yet to get his first WrestleMania win. Also, Chris Jericho went one-on-one with Fandango. Fandango entered MetLife Stadium with a gaggle of gorgeous back-up dancers. While Jericho had his finishing submission hold, the Walls of Jericho, locked in, Fandango somehow managed to counter it into roll-up pin to get the 1-2-3 and pull off the upset, as well as get his first WrestleMania win. Also, Team Hell No (Kane & Daniel Bryan) defended their WWE Tag Team Championships against Mr. Money In the Bank Dolph Ziggler & Big E Langston with AJ Lee in their corner. Similar to what AJ gave Daniel Bryan at WrestleMania last year, AJ gave her beau Dolph a “good luck” kiss at the start of the match. Well, just like last year, the kiss turned out to be anything but good luck because just like Daniel lost last year, Ziggler & …