The Real Looney Tunes

The Real Looney Toons

You know what is funny about this; this is exactly how I looked at The Real Americans. I looked at Zeb Colter as Yosemite Sam because of the mustache he’s sporting, Jack Swagger as Sylvester because of his speech impediment, and Antonio Cesaro as Elmer Fudd because he hardly has any hair. Whoever created the photo above; I give great credit and tip my hat off to him/her. Great minds think alike, I guess?…

WWE Money In the Bank 7-14-13: Two Brand New Mr. Money In the Banks Crowned

 

Money In the Bank Kickoff

During the Money In the Bank Kickoff (Pre-Show), WWE Tag Team Champions and Shield members Seth Rollins & Roman Reigns defended their championships against #1 contenders and Reigns’ second cousins The Usos (Jimmy & Jey). The Usos came within inches of becoming the new champions, but in the end, it was Reigns who hit Jimmy with his signature maneuver “The Spear” to get the pin and the win for his team and retain their championships. I sure hope The Usos aren’t done with The Shield because Jimmy & Jey are way overdue for a WWE Tag Team Championship reign.

It’s Not Cryback, It’s Ryback

Chris Jericho went one-on-one with Ryback. During the weeks leading up to their match, Jericho played mind games with Ryback by referring to him as “Cryback”; unfortunately, it was not enough to over come the powerhouse when Ryback rolled up Jericho to get the pin and the win.

Kaitlyn’s Injury May Have Cost Her

In a WWE Divas Championship rematch between BFFs-turned-bitter enemies, Champion AJ Lee (accompanied by Big E Langston) and Challenger Kaitlyn (accompanied by Layla El), Kaitlyn came into the match wearing a sleeve over her injured left …

WWE Main Event 7-3-13: Only One Hero Conquers

Christian

Money In the Bank Momentum

In a match that had huge implications for the upcoming WWE event, Money In the Bank, it was Christian (one of the competitors in the WWE Championship Contract Money In the Bank Ladder Match) who went one-on-one with one-half of Team Rhodes Scholars Damien Sandow (one of the competitors in the World Heavyweight Championship Contract Money In the Bank Ladder Match). After back-and-forth action between the two competitors, it was Christian who hit Sandow with his signature maneuver “The Killswitch” to get the pin and the win.

Victory For America(?)

Prior to the match between Sin Cara and Jack Swagger (accompanied by Zeb Colter), Colter not only expressed his discontent for illegal immigrants in America, but also the way in which Americans celebrate Independence Day. Colter’s rant did not sit very well with Sin Cara and was looking to prove a point against Swagger. Unfortunately, it was not to be, as Swagger forced Sin Cara to submit to his signature submission hold “The Patriot Act” to get the victory.

Big E Langston Dominates

In the main event, Curt Hawkins went one-on-one with Big E Langston (accompanied by WWE Divas Champion AJ Lee). While I am …

WWE Raw 7-1-13: The Two World Champions Collide

 

Every Money In the Bank Competitor, Except One, States His Case

With the WWE Championship Contract Money In the Bank Briefcase hanging above the ring and a ladder inside the ring, Daniel Bryan came out to state his case on why he would win the WWE Championship Contract Money In the Bank Ladder Match at the upcoming WWE event, Money In the Bank. Then, all the rest of the competitors for this match came out, which consists of Sheamus O’Shaunessy, Randy Orton, Kane, Christian, and CM Punk. The only one who was conspicuous by his absence was Rob Van Dam. After all the rest of the men stated their cases, chaos followed when Orton struck Kane with his signature maneuver “The RKO”.

Kane Gets Some Unwanted Assistance

Backstage, Daniel Bryan informed his former Team Hell No tag team partner Kane that Raw Managing Supervisor Vickie Guerrero made a match between Kane and Randy Orton with Daniel Bryan as the special guest referee. I am a fan of both Kane and Orton and was not sure who to root for in this one. As for the match, at one point, Orton kind of shoved Bryan, leading to Bryan disqualifying Orton …

WWE Superstars 6-28-13: The Miz and Antonio Cesaro Dominate.

 

The Good News

The Miz went on-on-one with Wade Barrett in a rematch from WrestleMania 29. In the end, the result was the same as WrestleMania; Wade Barrett tapped out to The Miz’s signature submission hold “The Figure-Four Leg Lock” and Miz gets the victory.

The Bad News

In the main event, one-half of Team Cobro Zack Ryder went one-on-one with Antonio Cesaro (accompanied by Zeb Colter) in a battle between two former United States Champions. In the end, despite a valiant effort by Ryder, it was Cesaro who emerged victorious. When is WWE going to give Zack Ryder the push that he so richly deserves?…

WWE Main Event 6-19-13: The Shield Continues It’s Dominance

On this edition of Main Event, Justin Gabriel and The Usos (Jimmy & Jey) took on The Shield (United States Champion Dean Ambrose & WWE Tag Team Champions Seth Rollins & The Usos’ second cousin Roman Reigns). In the end, just as Gabriel was going to hit Ambrose with his signature maneuver “The 450 Splash”, chaos ensued when the other competitors got involved and it allowed Ambrose to recover and put a halt to Gabriel’s momentum. Ambrose then hit Gabriel with his signature maneuver “The Standing Bulldog” to get the pin and the win for his team. I definitely think that The Usos should get the next championship opportunity against Rollins & Reigns because The Usos have not only taken a stand against The Shield, but they are also way overdue for a reign as WWE Tag Team Champions. Also, Zeb Colter accompanied Antonio Cesaro to the ring for his match against Sin Cara and prior to the match, Colter said that he admires Cesaro for shedding his European roots to embrace being a “real American”. As I stated before, I am convinced that when Jack Swagger, the guy that Colter currently manages who is out with an injury, makes …

WWE Raw 6-17-13: Changes In the Air

I was in attendance for this edition of Raw that took place at Van Andel Arena in Grand Rapids, Michigan. The show began with the new World Heavyweight Champion Alberto Del Rio (accompanied by his personal ring announcer Ricardo Rodriguez). Del Rio addressed his actions from the previous night at the Payback Pay-Per-View event and was met with a chorus of boos from the WWE Universe. After all of this, Del Rio then stated that for the last few months, he has fought for the WWE Universe and all they did was disrespect him. After making this statement, it was clear that both Del Rio and Rodriguez had turned heel. They are then interrupted by CM Punk (accompanied by Paul Heyman); Punk then made it clear that he did not appreciate Del Rio’s posturing. Then, despite protests from Heyman, Punk went on to challenge Del Rio to a non-title match for later on in the show. Raw Managing Supervisor Vickie Guerrero (accompanied by her assistant Brad Maddox) came out and announced that the match would happen in the night’s main event. Also, after losing the Intercontinental Championship to Curtis Axel the night before at Payback, Barrett was scheduled to have …

WWE Extreme Rules: The Shield Score Championships, Brock Lesnar Rules the Cage, Jack Swagger Says “I Quit”, and No One Is Left Standing

At Extreme Rules, The Shield (Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, & Roman Reigns) conquered and won gold. First, it was Ambrose who beat Kofi Kingston for the United States Championship. Despite the fact that the other two members of The Shield accompanied Ambrose, they did not play any role whatsoever in Ambrose winning the championship. Ambrose won the championship fair and square, so the entire world has no choice but to give the devil his due. Also, it was the other two Shield members (Rollins & Reigns) who won the WWE Tag Team Championship from Team Hell No (Kane & Daniel Bryan) in a Tornado Tag Team Match. Also, the “I Quit” Match between Alberto Del Rio (accompanied by his personal ring announcer Ricardo Rodriguez) and Jack Swagger (accompanied by Zeb Colter) to determine the #1 contender to Dolph Ziggler’s World Heavyweight Championship was a controversial one. It all started when Colter snatched the towel that was in possession of Rodriguez and threw it in the ring, trying to deceive referee Mike Chioda into thinking that Rodriguez had thrown in the towel for Del Rio. At first, Colter had succeeded in pulling off the ruse when Chioda declared Swagger the winner. …

WWE Smackdown 5-17-13: “Extreme” Momentum

The show began with an edition of The Miz’s talk show “Miz TV”. The Miz’s two guests were Randy Orton and Big Show, who will go one-on-one in an Extreme Rules Match this Sunday at the Extreme Rules Pay-Per-View event. Eventually, Jack Swagger (accompanied by Zeb Colter), Alberto Del Rio (accompanied by his person ring announcer Ricardo Rodriguez), Mark Henry, and Sheamus O’Shaunessy join the fray and then chaos ensues. Afterwards, the Senior Advisor to the Smackdown General Manager (WWE Hall of Famer Booker T) Teddy Long, who is running Smackdown while Booker T recovers from an elbow injury, decides to make a Six-Man Tag Team main event match for the evening between the team of Randy Orton, Sheamus, and Alberto Del Rio against the team of Big Show, Mark Henry, and Jack Swagger. Also, it was a family affair when The Usos (Jimmy & Jey) took on two members of The Shield (Seth Rollins & Roman Reigns, The Usos’ second cousin), who were accompanied by the leader of The Shield Dean Ambrose. Every guy in this match was a member of the famous Anoa’i Wrestling Family except for Rollins. In the end, it was The Shield who came out …

WWE Smackdown 5-10-13: Chris Jericho Wins, But Ryback Still Rules

The show began with an edition of Chris Jericho’s talk show The Highlight Reel. Jericho’s guest was Ryback and after things began to get heated between the two, the Senior Advisor to the Smackdown General Manager (WWE Hall of Famer Booker T) Teddy Long came out and announced that it would be Jericho vs. Ryback in the main event of the evening. Since Booker T didn’t appear to be on this edition of Smackdown, my guess is that Teddy Long was put in charge of the show for the evening. Also, NXT Champion Big E Langston (accompanied by World Heavyweight Champion Dolph Ziggler & AJ Lee) was supposed to go one-on-one with Jack Swagger (accompanied by Zeb Colter). However, Alberto Del Rio was ringside on commentary and before the match even officially started, Del Rio got up from the announcers’ table, went over to grab a ladder from underneath the ring, and then slid the ladder inside the ring. Chaos then ensued with everybody taking one another out with the ladder and in the end, it was Del Rio who stood tall atop the ladder holding the World Heavyweight Championship high. Could this be the scene that everybody sees come …

WWE Smackdown 5-3-13: The Shield Continues Its Crusade

I was in attendance for this week’s edition of Smackdown at Joe Louis Arena in Detroit, Michigan. There was one match that took place before Smackdown went on the air; it was between Bo Dallas and Curt Hawkins with Dallas coming out on top. Also, WWE Tag Team Champion and one-half of Team Hell No went one-on-one with Ryback with Ryback coming out on top. Also, before his match with Fandango (accompanied by Summer Rae), Zack Ryder informed the WWE Universe in a WWE Active video that he no longer refers to himself as a broski or refers to things as “Sssiiiccckkk” because he feels that those two things just aren’t working for him anymore. As for the match, despite seeing a more-than-ever aggressive Ryder, it was still not enough to put away Fandango. Also, WWE Divas Champion Kaitlyn received another gift from her secret admirer. Then, The Great Khali attempted to educate her on the ways of love. As I said before, while I think it’s acceptable for her to be interested, she should also watch her back at the same time because you never know, it could all be a trap. Also, Ricardo Rodriguez (accompanied by Alberto Del …

WWE Smackdown 5-3-13: Will Kane Avenge His Brother The Undertaker

Tonight on Smackdown, Kane will go one-on-one with the leader of The Shield Dean Ambrose. Will Kane be able to avenge his brother The Undertaker for what The Shield (Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, & Roman Reigns) did to him last week on Smackdown? Also, WWE Tag Team Champion and one-half of Team Hell No will go one-on-one with Ryback. Also, Sheamus O’Shaunessy will face Mark Henry in an Arm-Wrestling Contest. Also, Alberto Del Rio’s personal ring announcer Ricardo Rodriguez will go one-on-one with Zeb Colter. Lastly, Randy Orton will go one-on-one with one-half of Team Rhodes Scholars Damien Sandow. Tune in tonight at 8/7ct on Syfy.…

WWE Raw 4-29-13: The Shield Remains Undefeated As A Trio

The show began with a Triple Threat Match set up by the Senior Advisor to the Smackdown General Manager (WWE Hall of Famer Booker T) Teddy Long. Teddy did not run this by Booker T like he’s supposed to. As for the match, it was between Ricardo Rodriguez (accompanied by Alberto Del Rio), NXT Champion Big E Langston (accompanied by World Heavyweight Champion Dolph Ziggler & AJ Lee), and Zeb Colter (accompanied by Jack Swagger). At the upcoming Extreme Rules Pay-Per-View event, Dolph Ziggler will be defending his championship against both Alberto Del Rio and Jack Swagger in a Triple Threat Match. The winner in this Triple Threat Match between Rodriguez, Langston, and Colter would allow his respective representative to choose the stipulation for the Triple Threat Match at Extreme Rules. After outside interference from all parties, it was Rodriguez who rolled up Colter for the pin and the win; therefore, Del Rio got to choose the stipulation for his match at Extreme Rules. Also, just hours after making an appearance on the talk show “Today”, Cena came to Raw with three Make-A-Wish Kids. The three Make-A-Wish Kids were granted their wishes by becoming honorary WWE Superstars for the evening. …

WWE Raw 4-16-13: New United States Champion, Ryback Turns On His Fans

The show began with a rematch from this past Friday on Smackdown when Randy Orton & Sheamus faced The Big Show in a 2-on-1 Handicap Match. Despite Big Show dominating most of the match-up, Orton & Sheamus ended up coming out on top. This was the good news for Sheamus; however, the bad news was that later on in the show during an interview, Mark Henry ambushed Sheamus just like he did this past Friday on Smackdown. What exactly are Henry’s motives for these unprovoked attacks on Sheamus? Also, 3MB (Heath Slater, Drew McIntyre, & Jinder Mahal) called out The Shield (Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, & Roman Reigns), but instead, they got Brock Lesnar, who came out and disposed of 3MB. After Lesnar’s manager Paul Heyman came out to calm him down, Heyman then informed WWE Chief Operating Officer Triple H that Lesnar has issued a challenge to Triple H for the upcoming WWE Pay-Per-View Event, Extreme Rules. Lesnar has challenged Triple H to a Steel Cage Match. Triple H was late arriving at Raw this past Monday due to the fact that he was getting an MRI done on his injured arm. The good news is that nothing is …

WWE Smackdown 4-12-13: Fandango Attacks Chris Jericho…Again

On this edition of Smackdown, there were quite a few Raw Superstars that visited the show. The show began with NXT Champion Big E Langston mocking Ricardo Rodriguez’s introduction of Alberto Del Rio by introducing the new World Heavyweight Champion Dolph Ziggler in similar fashion. Dolph headed to the ring with both Big E and AJ Lee to address the success he had this past Monday on Raw by cashing in his Money In the Bank contract for an opportunity at the World Heavyweight Championship and defeating Del Rio for the championship. During Dolph’s address, he is interrupted by Jack Swagger & Zeb Colter. Colter tells Ziggler that Swagger played a huge role in him winning the championship this past Monday and that Swagger won’t be waiting so long for an opportunity at Ziggler’s championship. Then, he is interrupted by Del Rio who then tells Ziggler that once his leg is healed, he will be looking to reclaim the championship. Dolph is then interrupted by Chris Jericho who informs Dolph that Smackdown General Manager and WWE Hall of Famer Booker T has booked Jericho and Ziggler in a non-title main event match for the evening. Also, WWE Chief Operating Officer …

WWE Main Event 4-10-13: Will Anybody Ever Stop The Shield?

On this edition of Main Event, The Miz was absent for some unknown reason, so unfortunately, JBL sat in for him on commentary. I am getting sick and tired of having to listen to this douche bag every single week. He says the same things over and over again, he defends and applauds the dastardly deeds of his fellow heels, he keeps saying things that have me second-guessing myself, which is causing me serious psychological harm, these are just some of the few uninteresting and unentertaining things that the WWE Universe and I are forced to put up with every single week. The wrestling world would be much better off without heel commentators, the wrestling shows would be much more enjoyable. Anyway, the program began with a 6-Man Tag Team Match between the team of Kofi Kingston and Tons of Funk (Brodus Clay & Tensai) with The Funkadactyls (Naomi & Cameron Lynn) in their corner against The Shield (Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, & Roman Reigns). This was the first Main Event match for all three members of The Shield. At one point during the match, Tons of Funk told The Funkadactyls to head to the back due to The Shield’s …